It's mY Life...

Untitled 6 2011

2011-01-02T04:57:00.001-08:00

GUess what. I did prepare for the Novice Cup and wanted to get CHAMP. who knows. Someone go report me , said that i'm district player. So someone called me and ask me to withdraw the competition. ==.. At last end up with nothing. Arggh.

So my next target for 2011 is MMU OPEN. This time no one can report me anymore coz there is no term and condition. District is allow to play. Work hard for it.

Untitled 5

2010-12-04T09:12:00.000-08:00

LOL...i'm so fucking excited about the up coming badminton tournament. Novice cup. So excited. Still got two weeks to go. Can't wait!!!!!!!! Target men single and double CHAMP. Yahoo. Here i come!!!!!!

Untitled 4

2010-12-04T00:35:00.000-08:00

Just now saw you at MP working as a part-time promoter . Feel like wanted to say hi to you, but i scared. It's okay, at least i got the chance to see you.

Thanks God.

Bruno Mars - Grenade [Official Music Video]

2010-12-03T02:07:00.000-08:00

The song is about loving someone so deeply, and the pain of knowing that the person you love does not feel the same.

Untitled 3

2010-12-03T01:20:00.000-08:00

I just not good enough compare with other classmate.

Really disappointed with my current result.

I really study hard for my mid-term.

And i still can't get the highest.

But my friend did.

Sigh.

Pressure rising.

Untitled 2

2010-11-27T11:53:00.000-08:00

Sometime i feel everyone in this world are so childish. No human sense at all. No study. No moral value. Because of these childish people , i feel tired of everything. They only know how to complain and blame on people when there is some problems. Blame people for what?? will it solve your fucking problem. such an idiot. Lucky i'm patient enough to play with your fucking pattern. If not , i'm afraid you will be slap by me.

Not only that. sigh. i thought when everyone turn to 18 , they will mature enough to think. But i was wrong. They not even mature to think and still act like primary school student. Even a small issue , want to argue. Please God help them. I can't stand anymore!!!!!!!!!!

2010-11-25T11:52:00.000-08:00

One word to describe today..

UNBELIEVABLE

Untitled 1

2010-11-23T09:44:00.000-08:00

Laying alone in the middle of the night is kinda boring actually..But when come to boring this word, it really make think a lot..As usual, thinking about what are you doing, how are you and i hope everything is fine..Let me think, i think is been a while that we contact each other..Every times i wanted to find you but somethings was pulling me off..Tell me to make a stop or else i will be like a fool..i was laughing at that time because i am already a fool so why don't just continue to be a fool..Maybe not everyone know about how it's feel when you deeply fall in love to someone because in this world i believe there no more real love or we say pure love..there are only fake love..haha..that just my opinion..no offence..but i think going to be a year..time don't wait for us i think..But is kinda fun when you have someone that are so important in life your to care for..haha..For now i just need to concentrate on what i have to do..(is a part of story written by me)..Not really a story..just want to talk to myself..so write all these rubbish..haha..is hard to find someone to talk to now these day...everyone are busy..some lost contact..haha..but lucky i still got my blog to talk to...zzzz...i'm insane..

LOL...when i start to write story(not a story just a piece of trash)...haha..i also don't know..Maybe i trying to improve my English if not i really left out..When i start to compete with each other?? haha.. i also don't know..

Untitled

2010-11-22T08:29:00.000-08:00

I can't stand the pain

I can't make it go away

I can't stand the pressure

I'm sick of my life

I just wanna scream

How could this happen to me...

What i wish just for a normal life.

Can i have it?

regret

2010-10-07T01:38:00.000-07:00

this is my biggest fail in my life....

5 gud vs 5 bad

2010-09-17T14:33:00.000-07:00

5 reason that make me not to study

i lazy
don have the mood to study
everytime say later oni study
everday badminton and sleep
don like those subject(math and account)

5 reason that make me study

people look down at me
i study for my own sake
i study because i'm the one who pay the fees
no certificate no job
no job no money

stUdY??

2010-08-10T14:18:00.000-07:00

Student=study??? agree?? i tink i nid to agree although i hate books...people said , no education no future...i have to agree too..coz now...we reali nid tat stupid damn certificate to get a job...in another word is degree...at least a degree to get a job...but me...i reali do nothing...now my result become more worst than during the secondary time...lol...my dad paid for me to study..but i sleep inside the class...BAD HABIT...now...final exam is around the corner...but i haven prepare yet..FUCK...my buisness math..gone...account...gone...eccon...still alive...i tink is time to study...game time is over..sleeping time is over...concentrate EUGENE...PAY ATTENTION!!!!!

moNEy!!! i nEeD u!!!!!!!

2010-07-11T09:47:00.000-07:00

moneY moneY moneY moneY monEy moNey AND monEy....

whR the heLL aRe U!!!!!

i rEali neeD u..

cOz i waN tO buY mY tIng..

eSpecially a NeW gUItar...lol...

cUm herE faSt...

i'm waIting fOr u!!!!

dYinG vEri faST!!!!

2010-07-08T12:37:00.000-07:00

LOL...MId-tErm coming...How...i'm Scare lea...tat Day b.Math quIz...jSt 4 Question , n i Take 1 hour tO coMplete it...BUT...mOst of thE quesTion aNswer i cOpy fRm my Fren De...cOZ...i dON knW hoW to Do aT aLL!!!!!i Jst oNI kNw tO do 1 qUestIOn nia...i gOIn 2 b cRazy...i niD caTch up My maTH..iF nt , i GOin tO faIl mY MaTH!!!!!!!!!

excepT mE...

2010-07-06T10:11:00.000-07:00

uNI lIFE....vERi tOrturIng...

aNd VerI tIred tOO...

nOt biAsa wIf iT...

dURing oUr engLIsh clAz...

i daMn pRessure lo...

cOz moSt oF theM r bEtter dEn me...

the iMportAnt tiNg iS thY all sCore Gud rEsult in thr SPM...

eXcept mE....

LIFE

2010-06-20T00:31:00.000-07:00

i fEEl a bIt reLax now...coZ i alMost paY all mY huTang to them alrdy..fuuf..u knw how i find money these few days??i work like hell...i decide nt to choose my work..as long as i gt the money..thurday and friday i work as DISH WASHER...u knw hw hard izzit??after finnish work , i get RM22 for my 1 day salary..zz..tat time i tink...RM22 bt work like hell..izzit worth it??haiz..no choice...den saturday and sunday i work as waiter...herm..tis 1 nt my first time la..i use to it d...bt the most important ting is I GVE IT ALL ALRDY...

sMiLe?

2010-06-09T09:32:00.000-07:00

hoW r U???
i'm fIne...
nO sad At all...
plS doN wori...
is Tat too fake for me???
no matter how hard will be for me...
i jst have to smile???

nO hoPe...jsT gO..

2010-06-08T08:10:00.000-07:00

u knW wat...
i reaLI realI hate u....
why...
i always nid to cry bcoz of u...
nid to sad bcoz of u..
nid to worry bcoz of u...
y cant it change????
y cant u worry me for a SECONDS...
tat enough for me u knw...
u don even care abt me...
yet..i'm so naif to believe u tat u will change...
bt all end up wif same ting..
is tis call change for u???
i telling myself tis will be last time i cry 4 u...
i feel ashame of myself u knw...
i hate crying...
coz make me feel sucks...
bt i cant control u knw...
jst get lost frm life pls...
all the while i tot i'm the 1 who gt problem between our relationship..
bt it's nt...
after we break for a week...
den we bek together again...
i tink twice...
am i wrong??
now....
i feel no feeling at all to you...
just gve me few minutes to tel u....
we just END our relationship ba...

NO.....

2010-06-06T02:26:00.000-07:00

haIz..
SomEtimEs i RealI waNt tO kNw waT aM i dOin aLL tHe timE..
i dOn knW waT am I tInkiNg..
iS nT a fUnny tIng u Knw...
i haTe tiS typE oF feeLing..
i Don knw i'm wrOnG o nOt...
or mAybe YES..
Or mAybE nO...
i jSt hoPe is NO...
i trYing mY bESt alL tHE tImE...
jSt u dIn gVe mE AnY reSpoNs...
i HATE U..fOr GIviNg me tIs tYpE oF liFe..
aNd i'm BlEedINg...

aGain...

2010-05-01T08:54:00.000-07:00

LOL...

tMrW...

gOiN bEk...

lAsT updAte...

dIeYinG hEart..

2010-04-30T09:53:00.000-07:00

i RealI cAnt bEliEVe u Reali saY it oUt...u KNw taT reAli hUrt...aM i sElfiSh??i tiNk nOpe..coZ i trEat u reAli gOOd..bt waT aBt u??trEat me LIke a rUbbiSh..zzz...sO u don bE saD iF i saY sumTing tAt huRt uR fEEling..

chAnginG...

2010-04-27T11:03:00.000-07:00

wow..veri long i din touch my blog d...coz i m in ns 4 three months...bt nw i m having a five days holidays..so i mst take tis opportunity to sy wat i wan to sy...

i been thr alrdy 1 month plus i tink...i meet a lot of fren frm a lot of places...some frm kl , some frm sabah , sarawak , johor , seremban n many more la...the most important ting is i feel in tis world , out thr , there r still have many ting waiting 4 us...

bt nw..i feel every1 beside me is changing...some alrdy gt bf or gf...some goin overseas stdy...some start to enjoy their life..wow...i feel i a bit behind...coz every1 r heading towards their dreams..making their dreams cum true...bt me...i still clueless...i have no dream...zzz...

all the best my frens...

2010-03-28T01:16:00.001-07:00

gOIn Ns tIs tUesDay...
fUUf..
miZ eVeRyone...
bT i WiLL bE bEcK..

2010-03-16T12:43:00.000-07:00

haIz....
feeL mOOdy tHese FeW dAy...
dOn knW wAt haPPen tO me..
i tRy tO cAlm dOwn..
Bt jsT cAnt Do iT...
jSt hOpe tMrw WilL b beTTer fOr mE...

tHx , bt sHe??

2010-03-11T12:12:00.000-08:00

result???
nt tat gud...
gt a bit disappoint wif myself coz i cant achieve wat i wan..
bt nvm...
i told myself...i alrdy did my best...
i wonder hw was her result??
zzz....
scare to ask...
nvm..
now heading toward to my new goal..

rEsuLt.

2010-03-05T02:01:00.000-08:00

fuuf...
result cuming out...
a bit scare n wori too..
wori my result n my future...zzz
jst hope God will be my side...
and all the best...

2010-03-01T12:30:00.000-08:00

SoMetImes i fEEl tWo iS bEtTer ThAn OnE..

lIfE tImE

2010-02-28T22:24:00.000-08:00

iT's tIme tO ReSt......

mY stOry????mY liFE???

2010-02-27T13:49:00.000-08:00

thr is a boy..he's nt veri tall , nt veri fat , nt tat clever in studies , bt he has a pure heart tat care abt fren...1 day , he find out tat the gal tat he love , is oso love by his best fren...so he feel confused n don knw wat to do...den he decide to gve up..n wish the gal wth his best fren cn have a hapi life...bt the boy waitting 4 the chance...Thx God...finally the boy had the chance to love her...bt the boy nw is ardy with another gal..hw...tat time the boy tink , izzit God plying wth me...so the boy jst don care abt evryting..continue to move on..bt after a few month , the boy has alrdy break wth the gal he with...nt bcoz of the gal tat he love in the past..is bcoz the boy is tired of everyting..these few month , the boy jst like living in the HELL...bt he finally out frm hell...Thx God...bt those day the boy with his ex...he still gt contact wth the gal he love in the past...jst seldom...coz the gal bz working...she nid to work frm morning till nite 10pm...so thy have less time to contact each other...the worst ting is thy nt even same sch...thy oni cn meet during tuition...so 1 week oni cn meet once...so the boy always appreciate the time he cn c her...bt the gal don knw the boy love her...she jst treat the boy as her fren...bt the boy din sy much...the boy will miss tat gal veri much..coz he's goin to camp for three months..veri long time...bt the boy always tink , he n the gal wont get together coz he feel whn he told tat gal , tat he love her...the gal will feel shock...n the gal will sy ''r u kidding??''...so the boy untill nw stil haven told the gal...coz he tink mayb nt the rite time...bt he jst sy oni..his heart still tinking , will the gal like him??will the gal accept him??..he cant stop tinking...he wori abt those 3 months ,he spend at camp , will tat gal accept other guy...bt the time is running out 4 the boy...i jst hope the gal 1 day will knw tat the boy is waiting 4 her....

.....

2010-02-27T13:39:00.000-08:00

i jst feel every1 in tis world have their own limit...
bt i don have...
i tink i 'm too gud...
i cn help some1 , bt don care abt myself...
wat is tat mean???
izzit i care abt thm??
i still don understand someting...
y in tis world , ppl don knw hw to appreciate wat thy have??
whn thy lose thm , thy oni knw thy reali nid thm...
y izzit so funny..
y the boy love the gal , bt he cant tell the gal , he love her??
izzit the gal too cold...
izzit the boy wan to continue the relationship as fren??
don wan ruin his relationship wth tat gal...
funny...
bt i jst nw , i enjoying myself...

aT LaSt..

2010-02-23T11:53:00.000-08:00

nOW 3.25am....
stArT tO rAiN d...
tHx God..
at LaSt i feeL a Bit ReLax...
cOz NoW cN hEaR tHe RaIn drOp FrOm tHe SkY...
aNd i cN fEEl thE cOlD...
sUrE nIcE To SleeP..
i woNdEr hoW lOnG Cn iT lAst fOR...
hOpE i Cn hAve a gUd nIte SlEEp...

==...

2010-02-22T13:13:00.001-08:00

today after work , i went to have some drink with my lady boss...
i ask her...
Am i friendly??
Am i look fierce??
Am i look crazy sumtimes??
Am i Stupid ??
Am i lazy ??
Am i useless???
DEn...
She answer me..
Do u have any problem???
hahaha...
i laugh like mad...
coz...
i Knw she will ask tat...
bt...
she sy...
1.i nt friendly at all
2.i look veri fierce , don like to smile
3.nt sumtime crazy....is always...
4.ya...veri stupid...
5......veri useless...
den..
i told her...
if like tat den i tink u the oni stupid boss who will employ me tis type of worker oni...
hahahaha...
she ntg to sy....

Rain PLS.....

2010-02-22T13:08:00.000-08:00

zzzzzzzzz....
so hot...
hot until i nose bleeding...
zzzz...
fever lagi....
damn HENG.....
lose money still nid to sick....
zzz...
nid take flower bath d...
wash all the bad ting away....
aND...
PLS RAIN....
iF nT i WiLL dIE....

bAd nEws aNd GuD nEwS...

2010-02-21T11:49:00.001-08:00

>.<........today i gt two ting to say...

1...today i lose RM350++...in gambling...so damn ''lucky''....jst 30minutes oni..i lose so much..zzz...

2...it doesn't matter anymore...i have to continue my life...i wont disturb u anymore...we jst end here...i believe nw i much happier den before...i no nid sad or wat...U STILL TREAT ME COLD , never change...bt fine 4 me...coz...i feel ntg anymore...mean I'm out of HELL....^^

ok...everyting settle...^^v..

dIeYinG...

2010-02-10T10:28:00.000-08:00

zzzzzzzzz....
i tink nw my body is very weak...
coz everyday i jst slp 3 hours...
den i spend most of my time doing my own ting..
work , work , work...
nt oni tat...
nw i start to drink beer...
bt din mabuk la..
1 day jst eat 2 times..
dinner n surper...
den din exersice...
nw i veri fat d...
evrytime i went to work , i sure will drink a cup of coffee..
1 day at least 3 cup...
tat y my face go do facial oso the same...
den i eat a lot of panadol coz headache...
drink less water..
drink too much soft drink..
nw i tink i have to control everyting d...
if nt i will die faster...

i jSt wOnDeR..

2010-02-10T10:06:00.000-08:00

i jst wonder , i still gt how long to live in tis world??
i jst wonder , whn i go tat day , whr will i be buried??
i jst wonder , if i kill someone , wat will happen to me??
i jst wonder , if i have a lot of money , whr i will be spend on??
i jst wonder , how long can i stand with the pressure i carry??
i jst wonder , can i be a vampire??
i jst wonder , am i a perfect guy ??
i jst wonder , y so many ppl scare n hate me??
i jst wonder , y some ppl treat me so gud??
i jst wonder , wat course should i take after i getting my result??
i jst wonder , how many A's i can score 4 my spm exam??

i jst wonder.......

cAn'T bEliEvE iT...

2010-02-08T12:38:00.000-08:00

wow..
i alrdy find her bek...
i cant believe i can do tat..
coz i feel scare to find her..
thx God..
she reply..
nw mayb we jst a fren..
bt we nid time to knw each other more..
jst don look bek to the past..
tdy wat a shock..
u tell me , u feel sori to me..
i jst wan sy..
no..is me to u..nt u to me..
mayb i don knw y u will feel sori to me... .
n i feel sori to u too..
coz i nt tat understand u...
i have to admit i reali feel regret to break with u..
coz my tinking was always negative..
at last don knw who rite ,who wrong..
bt i jst wan u knw i reali love u..
those day we din contact each other ,
i reali feel someting is missing in my life...
i jst don have the chance to tell u tat i reali miss u..n i reali love u..
nw we contact wth each other again..
i will appreciate these day i spend wth u..
coz thr is no guarantee i will together wth u again..
mayb u will find another better guy..
who knw..
i knw we always sms..
no time to meet n spend some time together...
coz u tis yar STPM..
n me working...
no time n no chance to meet...
bt..
I JST HOPE U CN GVE ME SECOND CHANCE..

zzz.

2010-02-02T09:41:00.000-08:00

very tired tdy..nid to face a lot of ting in 1 day reali make me feel suck...u knw wat..(mayb u don knw)sometime i slp , whn i dream of u , i feel very hurt..everytime i tink of u , i feel wan to find u bek..bt i don knw wat to do...y cant i jst fast recover n forget everyting..den everyting will b fine..izzit reali nid time to recover??or i jst cant let go??everyday i seeking 4 answer..bt i cant find it...can i transfer my memory to other person??can i b some1 tat have no wori , no saddess , no burden , jst normal human n live wth happy life??

selling credit card??suck reali..i going to resign..altough i m helping my fren , bt reali suck..1 day cant sell a piece..zzz...tired..slp..

waT iS fReN??

2010-02-01T11:07:00.000-08:00

FreN??i DoN KnW wHicH 1 iS mY rEAL fRen aCtuaLi..i Gt tWo tYpE oF FreN..fiRsT tYpE is liKe tO teAsE ppL..sEcOnd typE is tHoSe whO doN sPeak mUcH bT haVe a gUd tInKing..sO wHcH 1 iS ReaL fREn??i fEEl fUnny La sOmeTimE..iF i diN iNviTe ThM gO aNywHr , dEn tHy coMplAIn i Din InViTe thm..bT tHE prObLem iS oUr tImE nT sUitAblE at All..caNt u All uNdErstand..i HaVe mY oWn lIfE nW..i HaVE tHe chOiCe wHo i wAn to Mix wth..i Din miX wTh u aLL , iT dOesN't mEan i fOrgET u All or otHer ReaSon..I hAvE mY oWn ChOicEs...Bt aT leAsT nW , i kNw wHo aM i And WHo R u..hOPe u AlL unDersTand..if u All wANt tO tiNK baD aBt mE , uP tO U..i sPeaCeleSS nW..

cRaZY...

2010-01-25T10:40:00.000-08:00

i'm reali damn crazy...coz i one day watch 3 movie at dp cinema...zzz...i spend total RM40...jst like tat alrdy gone...zz..my mum sy i sot d...haha..reali lo...wan to rest...after the first movie , i went to buy some cloth coz i haven buy any cloth 4 tis cny...zzz..bt at last no buy..coz no ppl comment n i don knw nice o nt..haha..den after the second movie , i went to have my dinner at MD...haha..bt the service reali damn lousy lo..zzz...after tat continue nxt movie...time past veri fast..nw alrdy 12.30 am...wan go eat surper...bt veri tired , so go bek lo..

C nEw Yar cOmiNg...

2010-01-22T10:36:00.000-08:00

Chinese New Yar coming...bt i cant go bek to tamPIn...i nid to stay at melaka alone...shit!!!coz nid to work...no off day...i oni off after Chinese New yaR...zzz...reAli haTe lo...bt No cHOice...hehe...my salary DouBble...wow...nice...den nxt money gt money to use d...haha..bt still veri long..==..

tIs CaN deScRiBe hAlf HoW i FeeL..bT nT aLL..

2010-01-20T09:48:00.000-08:00

dream...n lol...

2010-01-17T12:51:00.000-08:00

herm...i going to be a part time nurse...bt..cant do long...==...coz march i going to PLKN...suck...so don knw wan to do o nt...bt if i work thr , i will learn many ting..coz tat clinic is a specialist clinic..so i cn learn a lot of ting thr..n i wan work...i wan to use up all my time..bt tat stupid PLKN make me cnt work...zzz..sad..if i work thr , i will apply 4 being a helper n cn travel...so damn fun...n oso help ppl...haha..i oni cn dream...no choice..herm...i oso plan wan to take some course on baking...so i cn bake n cn do some business...make money..$$$$$$$$$...nw everyting r money...n money...no money no talk...haha...bt reali tired...nw i writing tis blog is 5am morning...every1 slping except me...doing my research on management...haha...coz mayb i going to stdy management...depend on result...if gud..i tink i will change my mind...i will take medic course...bt reali to get it...coz i nt tat clever...i'm a bit dumb...haha..

zzz...boss...these few days always kena fuck by boss...lol...fuck me gt reason nvm...bt no reason he fuk me...n always me kena...zzzz...nvm...nxt time i going to fuk bek...haha..n every1 will support me...coz no 1 like him at thr...sori 4 using rude word..haha...

wOw...

2010-01-16T12:17:00.000-08:00

fUUf....tired wan to update my blog coz everyday reach home at 2am...bt tdy have to update..coz i knw some shocking news...haha...i veri long time din talk with my bro d coz we din meet at home...whn i reach home , he alrdy slp..whn he wake up , i still dreaming..bt tdy , i went to his room n take his handphone n c...wow!!!he gt gf d...haha...he big le...n i getting old le...n nxt day i going to tell my mom tat she no nid to wori tat she don hve grandson to carry le...haha..

i wAnna gO hOme..

2010-01-12T10:59:00.000-08:00

i wanna go home..bt nt at Malacca...coz i wan to leave tis place 4 a while..bt my boss don let me off...zzzzzzz...and he nid ppl...haiz...reali f***...hope my boss cn let me off...i

laSt chAptER oF mY loVe LifE...

2010-01-10T11:04:00.000-08:00

herm..don knw wat to sy..n don knw hw to describe my feeling nw...bt still have to write down at here..coz is part of my life..my relationship with the one i love has end...why??mayb thr's someting tat i cant accept n mayb i'm blind...or mayb i too stupid coz put too much feeling in tis relationship...at last i feel disappointed...yesterday , i msg her tell her how i felt...n told her tat u treat me veri cold...n din even care abt me..den she ask me bek , wat i want??i feel sad i heard tat..wat i want??i told her...u knw wat..i don wan anyting , i jst wan u...den she jst sy o!!n she sy she feel sad whn i told her tat she nt care abt...OMG...den i said wat abt me???i nt sad , i nt pain ...hw u treat me...i gt feeling k...tat time i feel sad..coz she din even tink hw i felt...later she told me i tink too much...haha..i tink nt lo...coz as a guy , whn u c ur gf bluffing u , nt care abt u , treat u veri cold , hw u feel?? i tink too much..haha..gud reason...at last she said '' ok lo..everyting i wrong n say everytime i tink too much , she veri rimas''...at last we break...i feel veri sad tat time..n i cry...lyk a cry baby...coz..i reali don wan to break..bt we cant force our self n i had to accept...the last msg i sent to her was ''i sy sori to her coz cant be her perfect bf n wish her cn find a bf tat better than me..n i told her , i love her''....

tis is the last chapter of my first relationship..n i reali cant let it go...

neW...

2010-01-07T09:07:00.000-08:00

zzzz...
i finally change my hair style...
herm...
bt i tink most of my fren cant accept it...
coz a bit weird....
haha...
nvm...
bt i lyk it...
hope my new hair style will change my life...
begin with new life n new hope...
HOpE...

loVe U alL..

2010-01-06T12:42:00.000-08:00

wOw...tdy damn tiRed...bt nOrmAl..tDy i saw many my olD fRen...all have change a lot..some pretty , some handsome , some mature , n some 38...haha..bt i reali hapi..coz finally we cn meet again...n thx 4 u all advised...bt thr is 1 gal din turn up...herm..she's my kai jie jie...long time no c her d..miz her a lot...nvm..she bz..haha...bz dating...sori ar jie...u force me to write de..hehe...^^v ...Last...lOVe u alL..

aLL abT u N mE..

2010-01-01T11:35:00.000-08:00

u oR mE...
i jSt waNt a NorMal lIfE..
nT a cOmpLicateD one..
bT u wANt..
u mAKe me CraZy eVeRyTimE..
i aLrDy tirEd of It...
thX..

saD neW yEar..

2009-12-31T12:29:00.000-08:00

iS a rEaLi sAd neW yEaR foR mE..nT a HapI onE..aLL i wAn iS a haPi lIFe..nT tHe lIfE of cRyIng , eMoiNg oR sOmeTinG eLse Tat maKe mE fEel sUcks...bT tDy..Is rEaLi DamN sucKs..waT a nEw YeaR fOr Me..

mayBE..

2009-12-30T10:29:00.000-08:00

maybe tis will be the last time we will be together lyk tat..coz every1 gt their own life d...so..gud luck fren...

hey..don knw wat to say..jst wish u..

2009-12-30T10:05:00.000-08:00

wIsH u N ur bEloVed one Cn bE tOgetheR fOreVeR n eVer...

aNd..

alwAYs bE haPi...

oNE moRe..

bE mAtURe tOO...

dOn aLwAys CRy...

anD..

dOn aLWaYs cOmpLaIn tOO..

wOrK lo..

2009-12-29T00:32:00.000-08:00

tirEd..

nid wOrK uNtiL 1am...

zzz...

bt...

no ChoIce...

cOz No $$$$$$$$$..

fOr My eNteRtainMeNT..

2009-12-28T11:17:00.000-08:00

Adam Lambert

damn cool...>.<

i tink i will bcome gay!!!

iS tHe sAme cHristmas fOr mE...

2009-12-27T09:45:00.000-08:00

maybe i nt tat lucky...

bt it's okay...

I'm use to it...

coming!!!

2009-12-24T02:17:00.000-08:00

wow..

Christmas is coming..

n still gt few hours oni..

haha..

so excited...

why??

coz every year christmas...

i ' m always alone at home...

bt tis year..

i reali hope thr is someting new for me...

hehe..hoping...

MerYRy ChRisTmas eVeryoNe...

oN thE wAy tO genting n aT gEntInG..

2009-12-22T23:30:00.000-08:00

we r in LOndon Nw...

wow..5 superhero...

wow...am i crazy...haha..i lyk tis pic..

herm...jst upload few photo nia...others i tink no nid...haha...

wAT a wEEk at tampin....n kl too..

2009-12-22T23:19:00.000-08:00

cute??i tink so..nt mine..don knw whch sakai 1..haha..nt sakai..my cousin de bear..TAMPIN

nice??ya..Christmas decoration at 1UTAMA...in KL

am i hugging the bear??OMG....TAMPIN

i oni take few pic oni..coz no time to take..bt veri fun...

cRazY...

2009-12-13T23:26:00.000-08:00

soRRRy....

2009-12-13T10:31:00.000-08:00

i reali feel sorry to myself...

i betray myself...

i make myself confused...

i make myself suffer...

and...

reali sorry...

a bit tired..

2009-12-13T10:00:00.000-08:00

After few month we together...i feel tired...coz every time we sms or chat...u treat me veri cold..i din do anyting wrong...y mst every time treat me lyk tat...u treat me few time , i ok... i din say anyting...everytime i wil try to avoid frm quarel or wat..thx GOD..i did it..bt pls i reali don wan end up our relationship lyk tat..if u nt hapi , u jst say...don wan keep it...coz i don knw wat happen...n important ting...i don knw wat r u tinking...i knw tat ur past , u was a ply gal...bt i don mind...coz i believe in u...bt i reali hope u don treat me lyk tat..coz i m ur bf..n if u don love me jst say , i m okay... bt i reali care 4 u...

nEw liFe..

2009-12-13T09:37:00.000-08:00

tis article is special introduce to my fren...herm..my love 1...actuali i knw her quite sometime..bt we seldom talk..we oni talk through sms...she bigger den me..she tis year form six...bt i don care hw old she is..so after i settle myself n confirm tat i reali love her tat time..i oni express to her..bt first time i express to her through phone , she tot tat i was joking wth her...coz she cant believe tat i reali like her...haha..coz i din take any action...bt after few hour we talk on the phone...she finally say yes...den we jiu together d..bt at sch no 1 will believe tat i wth her..coz every1 stil tinking tat i still love the gal tat i fall in love for almost 3 years...bt slowly everything settle down...so tat hw we begin...

no TiTTLE..........

2009-12-10T10:07:00.000-08:00

herm..long time no cum here n update my blog le...y??coz wan exam lo...damn busy..stdy stdy stdy oni...n most important ting is I OUT OF SHAPE ALRDY!!!!!OMG...nw veri fat le...T.T...hw...bt nvm..lucky my exam i cn do..EXCEPT for ADD MATH n AKAUN...ppl say damn easy..bt 4 me..haiz...no comment..haha..nvm...bt tis few week..i realize somting..tat is i tink too much...i don understand y bcoz of small matter , i can tink tat the world is going to end..izzit nt mature??ya..i tink so..my mei n my love 1 always sy tat i tink too much..haha...i tink is true ba..bt at least thy knw i reali care abt them...erm...k ba..until here...

izziT haRd??

2009-10-05T11:54:00.000-07:00

hard or easy??

4 me is hard...

lol...

don knw why so hard...

it really piss me off...

arghhhh...

lOng tiMe nO sO eNjOy le...

2009-09-26T09:36:00.000-07:00

Jan Shen , Ah yi n mE...y me always so ugly de...==

fuyoo..tis is JAY TAN... (singing de) ...... Yi...don EMO...haha

tdy quite happy...i went out frm my house at 9am...damn early...den went my fren house..after tat my mom fetch us to bus stop..==...y don wan straight away to mp leh...lol...nvm..den we sat bus lor..no choice...we reach melaka centre at 9.30am...den we go take our breakfast first coz damn hungry...we went to melaka cantre the chicken rice shop...eat lo...after tat we straight away to mp...den we walk to DP de dreambox...wah...u knw wat i saw...so many leng lui...haha...bt no choice...coz i too loyal the 1 i love...so jst c nia...bt my fren heart itchi..ask me to take number..lol..i say i don wan n nt brave enough...hahaha...den we went lor...==..we sang 4 three hours...wah..damn tired...i mean my throat...lol...one of my fren , name : Tan Silk Shen , he call himself ''JAY TAN"..haha...coz he oso a big fan of JAY CHOU...he steal ppl mike n don let other sing...lol...bt quite funny la...we sang mostly JAY song...still gt two more fren...1 is AH YI n another is JIAN SHEN(guai shu shu) hope din spell wrong his name...hahaha...all r nt same sch wth me..two of them r frm SFI n another 1 is frm MALIM SCH...

after 3 hours SS in the room , we wan to hve our lunch..bt one of my fren still full...so we don wan to eat...den we went to the last floor...erm...a lot game there..so we ply lor...haha..later my fren say wan go back d...so we accompany him untill the place whr he wait 4 is bro...after tat , we went 4 JT..we go there jst 2 ply game n jalan-jalan..haha...a while alrdy 6pm...lol...now damn hungry...so we went 4 dinner at A&W...jst two of us..ME n AH YI..haha...after tat hve to go home le..coz my fren gt tuition so no choice la..

hope nxt time can go again...n hope nxt time will be more different...

bCOz sMall MAttER fIgHT....

2009-09-23T09:19:00.000-07:00

Fren...hahaha...fren...i have a fren...he's my first fren tat i veri close to since i transfer here..form 2 tat time , we always hang out together... we always share our secret...nt oni tat , if we have some problem we always try to solve it together..jst like brother..we always cycle together during tat time...coz he live in same taman wth me...tat time i fall in love wth a gal...i call her as"k"...tat gal was special to me tat time...so i decide to chase her..bt after few months , i oni found out tat , the gal oso is the 1 who my fren like...bt he din even angry or wat , when i tell him tat i like tat gal infront of him...he keep quiet..until tat day i knw...i oso feel sori 4 him..bt in the mean time, he fell in love wth another gal..i cal her as" Y "...so he tell me he like her...so as a fren..i decide to help him..hahaha...gt 1 time during PJ time , we ply football...den he fell down n broke his arm...tat time i try to help him...bt bcome lagi worst...den he went to hospital to do operation...tat time i feel a bit regret n sori 4 him..untill nw oso the same..

Den form 3..the second year i knw him...tat year we same class...we still the same...our relationship bcome better den b4...n he fell in wth tat gal nearly 1 year...bt still haven together..so i always try my best to help him...me oso the same...still haven be wth the gal i like..bt tat year isa our exam year...we had to take PMR..so everyting delay...

Den when come to form 4...everyting had change..it bcome more worst..we can say tat , we always fight..bcoz a bit of small matter den we fight...bt at last , we still back together...tat year our relationship become more n more worst...sometimes we fight are bcoz of gal...a bit jiu fight..nw tink back veri childish...

And now form 5 already...this was the forth year i knw him...tis year we having our veri last exam , tat is SPM...so we mst well prepare...tis 4 years i knw him , he make me change a lot...he always tease me my result nt gud...n always fail...so i geram...n he make me to study well in order make him nvr tease me anymore...i try veri hard...bt at last oso kena tease...so i put him as my rival in sch...hahaha...nt oni tat , tis year is his 17 birthday..so i decide to buy a watch 4 him...coz he don have watch..one oso don have...den gt 1 day , the gal tat she like sms me , ask me wat i buy for his buffday present...i say don knw yet..den she wan share wth me..so i say ok lo..gt 1 time , tat gal talk to me infront of me , he gt angry...after tuition he beat me...one time nia la...den he walk away...i was blur...n nvr tot tat he gt angry..bt when he found out tat is me n the gal talk is all abt his present , another day he say sori to me...bt i say is fine...den start frm tat day i nvr talk wth him abt gal...untill nw...den after few months , he found some1...den tat gal bcome her girlfriend...i was happy 4 him...so i n my fren always tease him "wah..gt gf wor.."haha..funny...den untill tis RAYA HOLIDAYS...one week holidays , so i ask wan go out mah ?? he say ok lo..bt he say he bring along wth his gf lo..so i tink n tink again...nt gud la..coz will b ppl big BULB...so i decide go wth my other fren lo..he say ok lo...den nxt 2 days , he ask me again , when i go out , i say on friday..wth my other sch fren...he say no ajak him.. den i say u go wth ur gf mah , tat day u say de...he straight away gt angry..tat time i so damn angry..i gt ajak him , den he say no...lol..den bcoz of small matter we fight...haiz....childish...1 of my fren ask me to back together...lol...i say i din do anyting wrong...y is me...lol...i gt ajak , say i no ajak...nvm...is fine...i tink 5 years frenship will end here ba...if back together again , i oso don knw when will fight again...tired...

huRt...

2009-09-21T08:57:00.000-07:00

A few hour ago...i saw something that make me feel sad n frustrated....i really don understand wat had i done to deserve all this pain...i feel tat i nt really exist at all..izzit i did something tat make u all nt happy or wat!!!i don understand...am i ur fren???i keep asking myself...will a fren betray or hurt u??i always look further n nt to look back...hw u all tease me , hw u all hate me , i really don care about it...bt at least nt be two faces person...make me feel sick...if u all really don like me , den y u all fren wth me???u all can jst tink tat i m nt really exist...if u all really wan fren wth me , den don ever talk or do something ugly to me...i have feeling..is really hurt...now...i really don knw who is my real fren...i don knw who i can talk to...everthing have change...my life worst than before...nt like the old time...everything have change...bt why me!!!if u all nt happy wth me , den jst say it out!!!don keep it...why u all keep it...bt i really did nothing wrong...i try nt talk much , coz i scare i accidently will hurt u all feeling...i try to keep a distance to u all , coz i scare my attitude will make u all feel nt happy...i try to keep quiet all the time , coz i don wan talk much...if nt maybe there will be something happen...all i try to do is to avoid some fight or hatred...bt u all don understand...u all will jst say that i m acting cool...bt is fine...i m ok wth tat...i jst don understand why because of small matter we fight...izzit childish...come on man...i too tired to ply tat type of game...if don be fren , den jst DON...i m ok wth it...all the while i m alone...so if i don have fren...is ntg to me...

secr.........

2009-09-20T23:40:00.000-07:00

If I had to live my life without you near me

The days would all be empty

The nights would seem so long

With you I see forever oh so clearly

I might have been in love before

But it never felt this strong

I don't want to live without you

Nothing's gonna change my love for you

You ought to know by now how much I love you

One thing you can be sure of

I'll never ask for more than your love

The world may change my whole life through

But nothing's gonna change my love for you

If the road ahead is not so easy

Our love will lead a way for us

Like a guiding star

I'll be there for you if you should need me

You don't have to change a thing

I love you just the way you are

So come with me and share the view

I'll help you see forever too

And

I don't want to live without you....

Thx a LOT...

2009-08-24T20:51:00.000-07:00

18-August-2009

haha...

tat day was my 17 birthday...

i really wan to thx to all my fren...

for their wishes n present...

i really appreciate it...

thx a lot...

n oso i wan to thx to my sis..

for her recording...

n i really lyk it...

bt...

tat day someting was missing...

bt its ok...

Thx oR Shui....

2009-08-24T20:46:00.000-07:00

22-August-2009

the history day of my life

i....

accident....

ridding a motorcycle...

den pom....

gve ppl laugh...

haha...

haiz...

no choice...

but...

is a gud experience for me...

n thx God i m still here...

NT Veri NicE...

2009-07-20T00:56:00.000-07:00

Nt veri nice...or nt nice at all...n oso veri dark nt tat clear...its nt complete...bt nvm...i wan to thx to my fren...lao kao...help me 2 ply guitar...n oso boon way...help me 2 sing a bit....thx...i wan to say sori to lao kao coz i sing nt tat gud...hahaha...malu oni...n oso my fren who support me...thx...i oso gt sing wrong at certain part...haha..hope don mind...if u all don mind can leave some comment abt the place i should improve or correct my mistake...thx...

at last....

2009-07-20T00:51:00.000-07:00

Fuuf.....

At last........

finish liao.....

so tired....

bt nt tat good....

disappoint....

but....

i learn a lot of ting....

THX GOD.....

THX MY FREN....(bulu dong , big head , faiz , hamtaro , kura , tweety , derek , lao kao , jee xiang n lot more)

AND...

THX MY TEACHERS...

change...

2009-07-02T23:06:00.000-07:00

Life...

has change...

now...

full of confusion...

sadness...

hatred...

no one will understand...

is not easy...

to become a good person...

is hard...

to become a bad person...

is easy...

no one will realize the ting u have done...

but..

they oni realize the mistake u have done...

is it fair to me...

or is a game to me....

n i don like game...

if i really have to ply the game...

i will accept it....

n i going shut ur bloody mouth up...

hate....but....

2009-07-02T22:57:00.000-07:00

i very hate it...

but i cant control it...

is very pain...

there is no cure...

patient....

is nt my type....

don knw how...

oni can keep quiet...

there is no one...

is lonely....

scary....

ask for help...

jst like talk to the wall...

ask for happiness...

it wont last forever...

the one i believe...

the one i feel sad...

tired...

have to keep moving...

give up...

nt the time...

but....

i have enough of everyone....

i m tired now...

bleeding....

2009-06-20T09:12:00.000-07:00

hurt

pain

sad

lonely

hate

bt......

i have no choice...

don knw...

2009-06-20T08:55:00.000-07:00

these few months i realize tat my relationship wth other alrdy had a gap between them...i cant fully believe them...n sometimes i really angry wth them...maybe there r someting happen between us n we don knw how to say it out...so we jst keep inside our heart...n i oso don knw whr did i wrong..or y i hate them so much...or someting.....so i really don knw to solve tis problem...

erm....

2009-05-24T03:10:00.000-07:00

Yoo~

long time no updATE~

N a bIt QuieT here~

nEW LifE sTaRt ,

NEw gAmE coMe ,

onE wOrLd ,

tWo dReAm ,

nO wOrlD ,

nO DreAm ,

PeAceFul loVe ,

noIsy hAte ,

cRy StuPid ,

smiLe idIot ,

loNeLy hAppY ,

couPLe sUcKs.....

THX~

true?? or i m just cant accept it..

2009-04-05T05:59:00.000-07:00

i always wonder what i really have in my life..but now i already found the answer....i have nothing..i m useless..ya.. i have to agree..sometimes my friends say ''i m good at nothing''...is true...i really good at nothing...all i only know is do nothing..i always scare one day maybe i will just kill myself and let go everything in my life...so i can live happily in the other world without any worry , pressure and sadness...i always worry about others but when i m worry about others some people will start to think that i m so busybody and like to show something...but i really don care what you think or talk about me..but please don let the whole world know i m the bad guy...coz i m innocent...and that your thinking...not others ..you all can hate me but i still have feeling...i don want bcoz of something that i did make you feel sick or what , please don say it out or do something that will hurt me or make me worry about myself....every night before i sleep i will always think back what i really had done to make someones hate me...i really have nothing to do with it...i m begging you all , please let me go...i m not that strong..although i can accept everything but doesn't mean that i cant be hurt...

when i was born i was very naive coz i still a baby...i don know everything...i thought that this world is full of beautiful colour and i also thought that if we want to success , the important thing is we must not give up easily and work hard for it..but now , i already know that i m wrong...coz every time i work so hard but i still also cant get what i want...not only that i also been look down by others people...i still remember one of my friend and my family told me that '' you cant do it and you have nothing..you also have to look at your own standard coz you are not good enough'' i really sad n i just keep quiet...i always wonder , is it true that i really cant do it...

SoRrY

2009-04-05T05:49:00.000-07:00

you know wat..sometimes i oso hate myself 4 going something tat i hate but i have to do...coz i been force to do...i cant control myself...maybe tis oso part of my attitude or wat...coz sometimes when i get angry or mad , i wont think before i talk..n i have already hurt a lot ppl with my bad attitude..n now i really have to say ''i 'm sorry''.....

sAd , tiReD , cOnFusEd

2009-03-19T00:30:00.000-07:00

sad?? i don wan to be sad....n always wan to be happy..bt i jst cant do it...i always don care about wat other people tink about me , say about me...bt nw i jst cant take it anymore...hahahaha...bt i still can pretend it tat i still veri happy...maybe tis way can make others nt worry about me..

tired??ya..damn tired...no time to rest...many homework , many ting to read , many ting to plan , many ting to worry....lol....nw life is like tis 1...so no choice...

confused??erm...ya damn confused...don knw wat others people think about me...n they just cant understand my feeling...they taught tat i m already dead...so they can say whatever they like....no choice...coz i m the special one...so tat y i m so famous...

camp.....

2009-03-13T05:51:00.001-07:00

ONe niTe sTanD CaMp

DaTE: 6 jUnE 2009

VeNue: SMK tUN hAji AbDuL mAlek

TiMe: 7am-11pm

$$$$ : RM 10 - RM 20

OrGaNiZed bY : " ThE OnE ''

CluB : sCout , gAl gUiDe , PbSm , KaraTe-Do

AcTiviTieS

sEcTion 1

MeNtoS
BiNgO
SBSS
AlOnE In tHe DarK
No cHanCE

SecTioN 2

RuN fOR lIfE
U cAn RuN BuT u CanT hIdE

SeCTiOn 3

BBQ tImE
dAnCe N SinG aLOnG
U muSt sAy iT!!

My pRojEct 4 2009...Hope u all can gve some comment on my project..or gve some idea 4 my activities...Thx...

tHe oNe...

2009-02-21T22:12:00.000-08:00

This time , I wonder what it feels like to find the one in this life.. the one we all dream of.. But dreams just aren't enough..So I'll be waiting for the real thing..I'll know it by the feeling..The moment when we're meeting maybe this will be the starting..not only that , maybe we straight away to the silver screen or maybe to have a date...who know...Tonight Out on the street, out in the moonlight ..And, damn it, this feels too right for us...but just a dream...until the moment that i stand be side you , is this will be the end?? or is it that moment when I find the one that I'll spend forever with??There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere ..There's gotta be somebody for me out there..and also the person is very special...You can't give up,When you're looking' for a diamond in the rough..Because you'll never know when it will shows up..Make sure you're holding' on..Cause nobody wants to go it on their own..And everyone wants to know they're not alone..

tired man...

2009-02-21T21:28:00.000-08:00

lol...

exam n my tournament at the same time...

OMG..

tired....

cant focus...

exam...

tournament...

don know which to focus...

not oni tat...

my exam n tournament is 24 hours away from now...

==!!!!!

Happy Birthday.... 2009

2009-02-15T00:56:00.000-08:00

my two little brothers birthday.....

1-Derrick

2-Clement

my family....my dad , my mom , n my two brothers....

First meeting...

2009-02-14T22:06:00.000-08:00

Describe-------

>>hot

>>busy

>>enjoy

>>nice

>>noisy

>>kek tao

>>no place to sit

>>a lot of new member

>>new teacher

>>n new wise president....

haha..not me lar....my fren...

bt i oni gt PRESIDENT nia.....

wakakaka....

hate...

2009-01-27T06:52:00.000-08:00

hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hatehate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate..

last chance n last year...

2009-01-18T05:04:00.000-08:00

Last year of sch...n oso tis is oso the last year i represent sch in badminton competition...tis time i hope tat i can be the CHAMP...haha...but i tink i ''can'' lar...coz kawasan tanjung is the most ''easy'' to be the CHAMP...n i will be...haha...dreaming....tis year i ply two event...one is single n another is double...haha..it will be fun...n i cant wait for it...

2 FEBRUARY the games START....

don knw wat to say!!!!

2009-01-18T04:37:00.000-08:00

lol.....no comment....u knw wat happen tat day....haha...so embarrassing....we enter the wrong classs....lol....how can it happen rite.....i oso don knw....may be we too blur...or we too 'clever'....haha...actualy tat day we wan to tuition chemist but we enter to physics class...after 30 minutes oni we realize tat we enter the wrong class...lol.....funny izzit....so laugh as much as u wan....lol....then later we come out frm the class...tat time i tink already 9.00 o'clock...tat time we jst wan to enter the chemist class...after we enter....everybody look at us...haha....-.-''....then we find a place n sit...then sir continue his lesson...honestly i very blur tat time...coz we stuck at the half way..haha...

new year...

2008-12-31T09:31:00.000-08:00

happy new year....

now i at tampin and alrdy 1.40am....i tink yesterday(31 December)i had a very wonderful day n was a last day of 2008...y i feel so happy...erm...i tink these few week i had gone through a lot of tings n at last i solve it..no more worry..but still gt a bit worry..now i feel more mature n hope 2009 will be better than 2008...how i celebrate...haha...a bit special n a bit simple...after finishing playing badminton with my senior , we (ah liang , lao kai , my uncle n me) go count down..u knw how we celebrate...haha...we eat satay...lol...n we sat there for about 3 hours...siao...we eat until 12.00am...so geng...four of us eat 100 stick of satay..wah...now canot slp...so kek tao...we sat there talk n talk...although our age were different by 10 years n 20 years but we can talk like we r the same age...lol...talk a lot of fei hua...then at last 2008 had past..at tat moment i make a wish..n i hope my wish will come true...

happy new year...

two days to go..

2008-12-30T00:55:00.000-08:00

two days to go , then my final friendly match will begin...tis time is a bit different from my other friendly match..coz tis time is ''TAMPIN VS ALOR GAJAH TEAM''..so i tink will be a very nice game n a good ending place for me ...coz tis two months i had gone through a lot of hard times with my performance n i finally gt it back..n i should be proud of myself..

still gt 49 hours before the final match begin..

back..

2008-12-30T00:29:00.001-08:00

hi everyone...i m back...but still not yet fully recover...tis time i wan to write about the experience tat i nearly wan to give up my life on tat day...ya...i knw...may be a lot people say tat i m too stupid n easily give up my life...but tat time i really wan to give up n the feeling i had were totally different...n my head just keep on telling me , ''i already tired of living in tis world''...but at last i din common suicide...when i wan to die tat time , i suddenly realize tat there are still a lot of ting i nt yet complete n there are a lot people r still care abt me...the important ting are '' i don wan to let the one tat i care , i respect n i love to worry abt me''..tat the reason tat nw i m still standing here n whatever happen to me in the future u r still the person i care abt much than any1 in the world..i promise to u n all my family ''i will continue my life no matter how hard izzit''..

my life is gone...

2008-12-18T12:16:00.000-08:00

tdy morning abt 2.30am i watch a movie , name ' secret '..tat movie i already watch before..bt tat time i don knw y i want to watch it again..nt because of tat movie is nice bt there is some kind of feeling inside me n force me to watch it again..i like to watch tis movie because when they play the piano my hand start to move...its weird i knw...bt nvm lar...while watching the movie...i cry..haha..long time no cry already...tat movie make me cry n suddenly i feel tat i m inside the movie...looks like i m going to the world...i knw its weird..but it's true..the part tat i cry is the guy feel in love with the gal tat he cannot love n the girl already dead..the guy don care abt her past n the guy throw away his future n back to the past because of tat gal..n the movie end here..now already 4.42am...i haven't sleep yet..in tis movie i learn tat don care how people look at you , n always be yourself..i learn it but i cant do it..i always care about people look at me , n never be myself before...the EUGENE tat my friends knw is like talk in class , very clever , arrogrant , selfish n has a lot of friend...but i tink tat EUGENE is not me...i don like to talk , i m nt tat clever , i m nt tat arrogrant , i m nt selfish n i don have much friends in my life..i prefer myself to be alone..i hate myself for being such a failure n for nt being myself...i wan to change myself back to the EUGENE tat i knw n not everyone knw..but i cant..i just feel tired of being other people..now i just feel tat i hate everyone in tis world..n i feel tat one day , they might betray me..tat y people say tat i m a coward..ya..it's true i m a coward..i m a coward because i have feeling..i like to help people..but some other people tink tat i wan close to the people n wan to knw a lot of people..n some other tink tat i m a person tat very action , like to show off..so they tink tat when i help people , i can show off wat i really gt..i just wan to say if u all tink tat i m the type of person..PLEASE leave me alone..n i have enough of it..people think tat i m perfect actually i have nothing...i like to play badminton..i always think tat badminton will be my second life n never give up..i have been go for training for almost 9 years..but tat day has come..i went back to my hometown to play badminton with my coach friend...n i had a most lousy game in my life...my coach friend say tat '' I HAVE BEEN GO FOR TRAINING FOR SO MANY YEARS BUT PLAY LIKE A PERSON THAT DON KNW HOW TO PLAY BADMINTON ''..n he say '' BETTER STOP TRAINNING LIAO ONI WASTE MY TIME ''..after i heard i feel like i m such a loser n feel shameful to myself..i m very dissapoint of myself tat time..i ask myself ''wat wrong with me?'' why i m such a loser..i feel sad n i cant forgive myself..ya...i nt tat clever...since i start to read book tat time , i already hate to study..tat y my result all the while is very bad..now...i feel tat i really a loser..nothing i can do..now oni regret..it's too late...next year already spm..m i ready? no at all..n my father company is going to close..wat can i do..i can do nothing..just sit down there n watch...a lot of thing has change only in a few minutes...ya..i admit i have a lot of friends...but who is the one who really wan to be your friend..ya it's true..form 2 , form 3 n form 4 , i always talk in the class n like to joke with people...but i feel tired now...i have a tough year..n i really have enough of it...

cHanGe LoR..

2008-12-17T20:49:00.000-08:00

everyone has change

i nearly cant recognize my primary fren

n i still the same

hahaha

WHY..

2008-12-15T10:55:00.000-08:00

Why?
Why'd it all end?

Why all the pain?

Why's the sunshine gone?

Why again all the rain?

Why all the lies?

Why all the heartache?

Why all the tears?

Why the painful cries?

Why all the fears?

Why's the bond we once had, now all gone?

Why is it that you are so far away,

yet you still feel so near?

Why can't I let go?

Why can't I just face the truth?

Why i m such a coward....

2008-12-15T10:44:00.000-08:00

Once is enough

-----------------------------
Purity once had a name,

And beauty once had a face.

Life once had a meaning,

And once I was safe.

Once there was freedom,

And once I could laugh.

Happiness once was alive,

And once I had another half.

Once I shared her love,

Once I was by her side,

Once I felt I fitted,

So quickly that died.

Her grace so great,

Her beauty so vast,

All I ever wanted,

Was for it to last.

Fate maybe had another plan,

Or maybe she had another love,

But it all fell apart,

The hand too big for the glove.

Now it's all died away,

Happiness, joy, love; all memories.

Now I walk alone in this dark,

dark world,

With no light to guide my way.

Empty n Confuse

2008-12-15T10:28:00.000-08:00

A warm sensation fills my body

My heart races with every touch

The softness of your voice soothes

My soul

As I lay there hoping the moment

Will never end

The sensation so strong

I can no longer feel my body

Slowly I fade in and out of reality

In an instant the warm sensation

Fades away

My heart empty

My soul torn apart

Lying there;

wondering where I wentWrong

Calling out for you,

only to find there is no answer

My mind invaded with thoughts

So cruel and unrefined

The sensation of fear of what's to come

Slowly the reality over powering

The lust and fantasy

Leaving me empty

Confused on how to think or feel

The loneliness I feel

So wretched and compelled

Betrayal to myself

Revealing the terrors of my love ..

Don wOrRy Be hAppy...

2008-12-15T10:20:00.000-08:00

I could have held you all night long,

I could have laid next to you forever,

But then I know tomorrow soon would come,

And still we couldn't be together . . .

I went against what my head was saying,

and followed my heart through,

And instead of quitting while I was ahead,

I started falling in love with you

We had so much fun together,

the memories we made so great,

all those nights laughing and smiling,

staying up so late..

As the snow falls on the sidewalks,

I know this too will pass,

for feelings are like the seasons changing,

and one season never lasts..

So, I know this must stop now,

and tomorrow soon will come,

as we walk away and never look back,

as our warm feelings become numb..

Don knW waT tO Do...

2008-12-15T09:51:00.000-08:00

sienz..........

sienz tat time make me feel crazy...n tink a lot ting....

lol....

sometimes after training oso don knw wat to do...

work...after oso don knw wat to do...sienz...

study...ya gt study....bt study a while nia...later jiu zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

boring......

2008-12-07T21:56:00.000-08:00

Elysia: wow!!! nice..

Elysia: huh....finish d....so fast...

Elysia: hehe...still gt...no yet finish...

Elysia: wah!!!! nice....i like it...what brand is this....

^^V

2008-12-06T06:57:00.000-08:00

HOW GUYS FLIRT:
1. He stares at you alot.
2. He hits you alot. (just play hitting )
3. He uses the first thing that pops into his head to start a converstaion with you
4. He yelled, "Hi!", to your mum that day she picked you up from school.
5. He blew off his buds to go see "Brown Sugar" with you cuz you couldn't get another girl pal to go and didn't want to go alone.
6. He tries to make you laugh anyway even if he gets hurt in the process
7. His voice gets softer when ever you two talk.
8. You hung up on him. He called you back.
9. You were invited by him to a group outing.
10. He called you to talk about nothing at all.
11. He imitates your laugh. OK, you do laugh PRETTY LOUD. Which makes you laugh even harder...
12. He remembers little things you mention in casual conversation
13. He sometimes stares straight into your eyes.
14. He uses every possible way to touch you (your hair, face, thighs, KNEES,ect.)

HOW GIRLS FLIRT:
1.She calls you by your full name not just a nick name.
2. She hits you softly on the arm and laughs when you say something funny.
3. She flips her hair when she's talking to you.
4. She touches your arm when she talks to you.
5. She says, "No, I'm not telling you who I like!" with a big smile on her face.
6. She asks you who you like or who you would go out with seemingly interested.
7. When you go to the movies with a bunch of your friends and she is almost always next to you.
8. She criticizes you on a girl you like.
9. You catch her staring at you.
10. She plays with your hair or tries to put make up on you.
11. Her friends outside of school and in school know about you, and says she talks about you a lot.
12. She knows your phone number and address. ( stalker much? )
13. She will try and talk, and spend time with you as much as possible

Now make a wish...> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>>> >>> >>> >> >>>>>>> >>> >>Ok stop! Your wish will come true ...